you're cute

Be quick as u can. U have 3 sec for each answer to honestly put what comes to mind. . . never know what ur sub-conscious may be telling U. . give it a try, remember 3 sec's.

1. I need a cigarette: gross

2. Sex: a really big deal

3. Relationships: ready for one again

4. Your Last Ex: asshole

5. Power: can be dangerous

6. Marijuana: has caused a lot of problems in the past

7. Crack: stupid

8. Food: my life

9. This President: ........ no words.

10. War: something no one understands right now

11. Cars: can be really fun

12. Gas Prices: redic.

13. Halloween: one of the best hollidays

14. Bon Jovi: "ITS MY LIFE"-snowball06<3

15. Religion: has importance

16. MySpace: is sketchy

17. Worst Fear: not telling people i love them before i lose the chance. regret is the worst.

18. Marriage: if u find the right person, the best thing that can happen to you

19. Fashion: i dont have any

20. Brunettes: are crazy mofos

21. Redheads: im living with two next year, basically they are amazing

22: Work: all i do is work with kids so its always fun for me

23: Pass the time: music

24: Football: DAAA BEARS

25: One night Stands: gross

26: Pixie Stix: omg does anyone remeber people snorting it at field hockey!!

27: Vanilla Ice: is on celeb reality

29: Porta Potties: at the sister hazel i saw the nicest porta pottie in my life. awkward thats what i thought of?

30: High school: i wouldnt change anything about it

31: Pajamas: is what i live in

32. Wood: knock on it

33. Surfers: HOT

34. Picture: (s) is next to music what defines my life

35. First Love: is someone ill never ever forget and will always have a piece of my heart

david and jessica are getting married!!!! :)

finally!
im so excited :)

I am hardcore.
I will windmill kick you in the face.
Everybody back up, make a circle, let’s destroy this place.
The lights are low and I’m about to go off. Here comes the break down, ka-ra-te chop!
Raise up your arms, make an X if you’re down.
Me and my crew, we own this stinkin’ town.
Watch out for my fist, your face it will kiss on purpose. I’m tough and I’m ticked.

I don’t slow dance, I don’t salsa dance, forget the tango.
I don’t slam dance you idiot, I dance hardcore.
On the floor, I’m the man you’ve never seen before.
When the drummer yells, “go!” it’s my time to blow.

And in between songs.
I yell at the band, cause I don’t care what they have to say.
I’m not here to learn anything anyway.
I’m here to dance. In the zone, in a trance.

I don’t smoke cigarettes, but if she’s willing I’ll drop my pants.
Promiscuous I am, but I’m vegan, I don’t eat ham or any of that stuff cause it’s bad for you, right?
Save the animals, forget the sweatshop scandals!

I do not shop at hot topic.
I am not Mall Core, I am hardcore.
Madball, Hatebreed, Throwdown, Terror.
I own all their records on colored vinyl, limited edition and hand numbered.
But you won’t see me asking for no autograph.
I ain’t lookin’ like no fool.
I ain’t no pop culture tool.

If they ain’t screamin’, I ain’t listenin’.
If they ain’t got a blast beat, I ain’t tappin’ my feet.
I eat emo pansies for breakfast, and give their little t-shirts to my little sister.
So cry about it you messenger bag, purse carrying whatever.

I wear girl pants, but I’m homophobic. Yet the way I’m always huggin’ on my homeboys you sure wouldn’t know it. I’ve had my ears stretched an inch since back in ’96. Somebody told me hardcore was a place to share what you believe, but I didn’t like what dude said, so I flipped him off and told him to leave.

I’m mad at society because my parents won’t buy me a new computer
(even though I asked politely)
My playstation 2 is broken, but my Xbox works.
When that breaks though, something will hit the fan and I’ll express myself with rage and anger, just like a man. Cause that’s how it’s done, right?
You get mad and start a fight, right?
I think I may, I think I might, take my insecurities out on that punk in the pit tonight.

Cause really, I am just insecure.
More than that, I’m kinda scared and hurting inside.
And I don’t know how to deal with it.
I don’t know what being a man means.
I thought acting tough was the way to go.

But now that I think about it…
I’m emo.
.bradley hathaway.

so last night i went to go see him
it was really cool.

ps-5 days until the best weekend of my life
pps-kimberly wagner i love you so much nd ur package has made my week :)

icantwaittocomehomendseemyfriends!

do not worry about anything, instead pray about everything.

5 days.

tonight, tonight's gonna be the last night ill try
ill try to get by, maybe tonight if it goes just right
i started with a bottle, bottoms up
im out of luck, hope was its best friend
left them at the top, cold hands in coat pockets
clinching my daughter's locket
what would she think of her daddy now?

all you need is love
all you need is love

a little love, a little love is all it takes
a little love, a little love its never too late
a little love, a little love and faith

shove the papers into the case
im heading home home cause the hands just struck 8
and on and on it goes
tired of this repetition
over and over
and not getting closer to where i want to go

and they say
all we need is luck
BUT no all you need is love

a little love, a little love is all it takes
a little love, a little love it's never too late
a little love, a little love is all it takes
a little love, a little love it's never too later
a little love, a little love and faith
::between the trees::

so my friend kristi's best friend is dating a guy from this band wes
and i just got their cd and they are rockin it
and they are also goin on tour with amazing bands
and he met andrew mcmahon and chris carabba
thats freakin sweet.

not gonna lie ive been having a really rough couple of weeks here
i really just wanna go home for a couple of days nd take a break from college for a while
its just hard when some people ur surrounded by dont wanna be here
and no matter what you do to change their minds and make the best out of a situation
they are waiting there to push u down again.

i read one of my oldest friends journal today
hes possibly one of the strongest people i know
i hope he gets all the happiness he deserves
god, hes so strong.

its amazing how someone could be feeling the exact same things you are feelings but for totally different feelings
its insane how dangerous someones mind can be.

went to the best party since ive been here last night
good thing this kid has one almost every weekend
thats a plus plus.

19 days until happiness
and kristi moler gets to experience the best weekend of my life with me
be jealous.

less than the month til i get to come home for thanksgiving
im so excited to see my friends again
i forget what it feels like to be around people who really know you
and will love and understand no matter what
i really miss that. <3

veryyyy interesting weekend.
saw sister hazel(freaking amazing every single time)

did something i should have done a long long time ago
felt amazing
most truthful thing ive ever done in my life
i feel like 50 billion pounds have just been lifted off my chest

i havent stoped smiling about it all day

oh yeah and the weather here is pretty much amazing

oh yeah and theres this girl here megan bubalo and she could possibly be one of the most amazing human beings
ive ever met in the entire world.

i miss my old friends like none others but im finding some really awesome new ones
its so amazing how little things can change your view on almost everything

Anger he smiles towering in shiny metallic purple armor
queen jealousy, envy waits behind him
her fiery green gown sneers at the grassy ground
blue are the life-going waters taken for granted
they quetly understand
the once happy turqoise armies lay opposite ready
but wonder why the fight is on

but they're all bold as love
yeah, they're all bold as love
they're all bold as love
just ask the axis

My red is so confident that he flashes
Trophies of war and ribbons of euphoria
Orange is young, full of daring
but very undsteady for the first go around
My yellow in this case is not so mellow
In face im trying to say it's frightened like me
And all these emotions of mind keep holding me from
Giving my life to a rainbow like you

I'm bold as love
Yeah i'm bold as love
I'm bold, bold as love
just ask the axis
Yeah he knows, he knows everything
I'm bold, bold as love


next weekend im going to north carolina for the DUKE game
road trip with cam is gonna be freakin amazing
u should be jealous.

ps. i miss home slash my friends mucho
<3

and i will wait forever.

"A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared wtih the world the secret of his success. Never leave that till tomorrow, he said, which you can do today. This is the man who discovered electricity. You think more people would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard our grandpaprents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore. Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the hell out of never trying."
.grey's anatomy.

hello all my non exsistant readers. haha its funny just because no one really does read this anymore but its all good in the hood.

so its officially been two weeks here at the beautifullll florida state nd i must say it feels like its been at least a month.
it has been the most amazing/hardest experience ever.
leaving home was hard and leaving the people and friends that i loved was even harder
it is really hard to walk into a place where you look around and dont see anyone you know but at the same times its the most intense exciting experience as well.
me and my roommate get along really well.
we clicked and the first few nights just sat up talking with each other and honestly i dont know what i would do without her here she is hands down my closest friend ive made here. everyone asks us if we knew each other before we got here cause we are together a lot and always have a good time.

nothing too crazy has been going on.
this weekend i went home to orlando with one of the girls in my dorm.
5 of us went home and went to freaking disney world.
we were able to get in to all the parks for free because my friend, kristi, worked there during the summer and her mom is like a lawyer or something for disney are are special members and can go for free and take us for free whenever we want.

hands down one of the coolest experiences ever.

there are 4 of us that have gotten really close here and this friday me and my friend megan are going to party at a frat nd the two of us plus holly are going to a club that is right around here. i finally get to experience why fsu is one of the biggest party schools.
helllllls yesssss.

last night i had to say bye to my friends.
"growing up" is hard but moving forward is even harder(i think)
this summer was.amazing.
and there are things i wish i could just freeze and they would be exactly the same when i get home

im just gonna go through all the people at jens last night because everyone there i consider one of my best friends and wouldnt know what to do without:

jennifer michelle: you are truly one of my best friends. this summer was amazing with you and we got so close where it got to a point where it was just a natrual thing for us to hang out. we grew a lot this summer and learned how to comprimise with each other so when we needed out space we both understood and gave it to each other. ur family is like my family and your house is like my second house. i love you so much and i really hope things between us dont change. be careful in college and be smart. ive never seen someone grow so much in one summer and u are gonna just be amazing in college. I LOVE YOU!

alyssa: you have been the one survivor throughout my life. i met you when we were in preschool and i cant imagine a time in my life or memories without you being a part of them. i remeber going to ur house almost every day when we were neighbors and when u moved away i cried for like a week. i remeber that my summer plans would be call alyssa and play basketball outside of my house until it got too dark or the bugs attacked us or u got really angry at me for winning and left(hehe). then highschool came and we just never drifted apart. even the times when we werent "super" close u were always connected in my life and our friendship is one of those bonds thats just never going to change.

kimmy(girlfriend)wagner: well i met you my sophmore year on jvb field hockey and u really didnt like me. you even had a team sleepover and purposly didnt invite me or jills. then junior year came and we actually took the time to get to know each other. and once we did...we pretty much started dating(in field hockey world). we disagree on a lot and most of the time our views are polar opposites of each other but throughout that all we have a common respect and understanding for each other and after my senior year u became part of my closest group of friends and i really dont know what i would have done without you. you are the only person to stand up and tell me when im being a total ass and that my friends is what brought us even close and made our friendship as strong as it is today. never change kimmy<3

jenni schwartz: well i just met you this year and we really didnt become close until the end of the school year. i honestly wish i had more of your qualities. i really do admire you so much. you have the biggest heart in the entire world and accept everyone no matter who they are. you are possibly one of the most outgoing girls i have ever met and you are hardly ever seen without a huge smile. you are friends with everyone and ive never heard any negative comments about you because i think if anyone talked shit about you they would be shot by 15 people defending you. you are also the most original girls ive ever known literally living in their own world. im very jealous of your ability to be so comfortable in your own skin and its what draws people to you. i love love love love you and im gonna miss the talks we have. i know we will see each other on the breaks. i love you.

bradkins: duuuuuuuuude i love this kid. we have gona to junior high and high school together and really didnt start to get super close until this year. we had 2 classes together and had our little trio in the back of the room for english. we got close throughout the year but the start of the summer came and i thought this was gonna be one of those "school friendships" where you dont see the person after this but while in school u guys were tiiight. well i guess we proved that wrong. clearly it was music that brought us closer because i think we could talk about it all day. you are one of those guys that you can just feel comfortable around no matter what and u really are an amazing friend. im gonna miss you so much and i really hope we dont drift cause i really really value our friendship a lot.

boofaloof: oh my lantern. this kid is freaking hilarious. he has the sarcastic funny down to a key and can me laugh so hard. we had 2 classes together junior year where we would be lab partners and we would ALWAYS fuck it up some how. im really happy that bradley brought you with to the lbc concert because i consider that one of the best nights of the summer. ur family freaking rocks dude and ur dad is almost as funny as you(oooooooh jerry) haha and your dad gave me the best compliment ive ever gotten in my life and we pretty much love each other or something. haha im gonna miss you and we are most def. chillaxing when i get home.

christopher wang: well sir, we had the same friends majority of the year and were accquinted with each other but never really formed that friendship. and once everything kinda went to hell and me and all of ur friends kinda drifted we suddenly got a lot closer. you give crazy good advice and possibly one of my favorite people to talk to. you are the most down to earth person i know and people respect you for that. you are gonna do something amazing someday i swear and i will be very proud to say that we are friends. thank you for the goodbye present(i havent read the letter yet because im not in my dorm room yet) but the cd rocked and really really meant a lot. and dont say "have a great year" dummy im clearly gonna see u on my breaks.


FINALLY....

THE P QUAD: you guys just get your own little section. we all went to the lbc concert together and after that night we formed our own little click. we hang out with each other and its just like a comedy show. we make each other laugh and we can be as stupid as we want because for some reason we all feel super comfortable around each other. you guys really impacted the second half of my summer and when i think back on my summer before college you guys will be the major reason why i loved it so much. i hope when we get back nothing changes and that brad nd boofy u guys will still be with me and jenny because we love you boys. we have friendship braclets(admit defeat: MOO) one day we are just gonna admit everything to each other. i need to teach myself to stop talking like you clowns.
man i love you guys nd im REALLY gonna miss you.

move in day tomorrow.
hellooooooooo college
(admit that ive never been more excited and scarded in my life)

music my friends is my diary entry

matter of time-cartel
ordinary day-vanessa carlton
swiss army romance-dashboard confessional
the secret's in the telling-dashboard confessional
pig-dave matthews band

im really ready to go to college
because i need to leave
my mind goes in circles while im here still

sometimes things that were broken were suppose to stay that way

people move on
so should you...

it doesnt matter if a friendship or relationship impacted your life
because it prob. didnt matter as much to the other person

get your seatbelt on
because its time for something totally different

goodbye highschool livejournal/friends
see you in college(or not)

this is a quote i found on ellies profile nd im just gonna write it as my entry because it sums up everything right now...

its hard to wait around for something that you know will never happen
but its even harder to give up when you know its everything you ever wanted

so im cleaning out my room tonight because im really tired from camp and i realized that im leaving in 16 days nd i know that those days are gonna be filled with goodbyes and preperations so i wanna just start cleaning up now while i have time.

while i was sorting through basically my memories from junior high onward i came across the massive stack of road warrior stuff including all of our playbooks nd schdules and just everything from the 5 years we played together. on our first christmas we spent together which was when we were in 6th grade my amazing coach (coach cohen) made us all a poem and it kinda just sumed up why i loved this team so much nd how important a part in my life they played
and it just shows that a dedication by a coach who truly loves the game and his players can really affect a team and each individual players life forever
i just wanted to write it out here cause it still brings a smile to my face--its kinda lengthy nd its about my team so yeah thats the rest of the entry so just prewarning if u wanna not read it then stop now...
lol



ODE TO THE ROAD WARRIORS!-by coach cohen

Well, this is the story bout the Road Warrior gang,
who gathered as a bunch and created quite a bang

Twas a day back last march, when they all came together,
to bounce that little roundball that is made of good 'ole leather

A phone call to each, excited they were all
to find they made the team when they got that happy call

Well we all came together, a few practices we had
and as we got to know each other we didnt look too bad!

Then one day when school was off, together we did come
as Mullery opened up her gym to us-and boy did we have fun!
We gathered nice and early, and put in all out "stuff"
but by 4:00, we all clearly had enough

The first league that we entered out in Niles, was the place
the competition wasnt good and we easily won that race
the road warriors would play really well, we could sure shoot and run
but some of the other niles team couldnt walk and chew there gum!

Then we switched around and got really bold,
and for the first time ever we put on the vagas gold
we took on the NORTHWEST HUSTLERS, they of all star fame
they beat us pretty good but we gave 'em a decent game

Our roster finally done, our team was set to go
the curtain finally opened for the new road warrior show
we traveled all around, we went from to and fro
from Aurora, to Wisconsin, and downstate we did go

What made it all so fun, was the great group that we did have
a really special group of girls both on the court and off
they played game so rough and tuff and really oh so hearty(this was my coaches sense of humor)
then off the court, when game did end- this group they sure could party!

ok well then it goes into each individual girl which i wont write out because no one knows any of them but ill just give u a preview: THEY ARE THE MOST AMAZING GROUP OF GIRLS EVER!!!!


my verse went like this:

and lest not forget our Sam, the surprise of the team
who improved her play so much she gained all our esteem
she was kind of quiet, just a little bit shy
but we soon learned that she could talk and then...oh my oh my!

nd skipping to the end....

and lets not forget our coaching staff they sure had lot's of fun,
2 old and worn out veterans and then the pretty one
coach cohn was intense sure but calm now just the same
but he spent most of his time making sure Leske didnt get thrown out of the game
Jen joined us early on-she was a breath of real fresh air
you could tell she loved to coach and surely she did care
on road trips Jen was tired, her eyes were sometimes red
for late night it was her job to finally get those kids to bed.

it really was a special group this fun road warriors bunch,
and this year's even better-for that ive got a hunch

we gather now to party--to celebrate years end
and here one final message that we would like to send

were thankful for a lot of things, our health and friends and all
but once you are a Road Warrior you can always stand real tall
a group that came together and became so very close
the friendships we have formed are what we treasure most

this is really hard.

really hard.

jenny thanks for being there for me today
jannessa i cant even start to describe how much i love you nd how amazing you are
thank you for talking to me forever nd just understanding everything nd always knowing the right things to say

so i was thinking about what makes someone attracted to someone else
and how many types of attraction there are

there is that type of attraction that is just pure lust
basically u just wanna fuck the hell out of that person
for no other reason than u think they are really attractive looking

then there is the type of attraction that goes off personality
that u dont think they are that cute but they have a kick ass personality in which makes u feel attracted to them

then there is the type of attraction that grows on you
that u meet someone and u think they are cute looking but just kinda eh
then u get to know them and suddenly they start to grow on you nd then u find urself
very attracted to them

but...
do u think there is a time attraction or confort attraction
i mean ok u think u can just be attracted to someone because of how long you have known them
or that u created a bond when u were younger nd now its just kinda there
like ok say u were friends with someone when u were younger but during that period it was purely a friendship
then u dont see them for a while and then u see them again nd there is a weird sort of attraction between the two of you
i wonder if that is just an attraction because of the comfort level or because it brings u back to a familiar place

or if its not a attraction at all if its just a confort friend zone.

then finally there is just that immediate connection attraction
where u just look into that persons eye nd feel it
u think they are good looking and have an amazing personality
and everything just clicks

u think the last two are more represented of true love
whateverthatmeans

less then a month until i leave
crazy.scary.exciting!

love you
sams xo

i hate waiting

and im def. waiting
for more than one thing

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

"Cigarettes, cigarettes and cheap champagne
Watching movies in the dark but really listening to the rain
Jealousy, two years of tainted history
Swallowed whole can dig a hole deeper then any cemetery"

if u havent listened or downloaded cigarettes by lucky boys confusion you need to.the song is fucking amazing.

lets just say that this week has rocked
but has also been really exhausting

wends went to lbc on a double date with j and boof and brad nd i can honestly say that was one of the best/most fun days of the summer we just all kinda clicked as a group nd had a realllllllll good time
"oh my...moo" replace sundae owow

tonight went to summerfest
saw a little bit of panic! but decided that dealing with dumbass 14 and 15 year olds was just not worth it cause they were all being stupid nd moshing with like a billion people there nd just getting all pissy
butttttttttttttt i did get and awesome henna and a new necklace that im IN LOVE with

one more month until college
wowzers.

love you
sams

ps-will u please come back into the country. that message wasnt a lie i really really do need to talk to you.

sister hazel makes me very happy


all for you does not


i met the band tonight nd they are the coolest guys ever
im gonna go see them tomorrow again in naperville


concert week begins :)